You believe you are coasting along life’s journey.
Trying your level best to do the right thing and hoping that it will work out for good.
You have read the books, you have watched the videos and you have listened to the stirring podcasts.
You are really fired up, you are motivated, inspired to have a great life. The kind of life that the Americans call the American Dream.
Hey, you have even taken the first steps towards that DREAM.
But just as you thought you had it figured out, life floors you with a straight hook and you collapse on the canvas,embracedrated and desperate.
What goes through you mind when you are on the canvas and it seems your acts will amount to naught?
So has everything been a lie?
Is it impossible to change your circumstances?
Romans 7:15-25Amplified Bible (AMP)
15 For I do not understand my own actions [I am baffled and bewildered by them]. I do not practice what I want to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate [and yielding to my human nature, my worldliness—my sinful capacity].
I found myself in a conundrum when I reached all the goals I had set myself. I struggled to move ahead and I found some habits that I thought I had dealt with creeping back into my life and that really floored me.
I was convinced that I had done well but chaos was creeping back in.
So what was I doing wrong?
I followed the advice to the letter.
I had the goals and I was taking consistent action but I reached a point where the progress stalled and desperation set in.
Why Failure Is Your Best Friend If You Want To Keep Improving
Goals and consistent action are part of the strategy.
But they aret just part of a long-term process, it begins the process, then you need something to maintain the momentum.
As I tried to figure the next step guess what, I was surprised by a seemingly illogical thought seaped into my mind.
FAILURE was the KEY to unlock my conodrum.
Failure was my teacher and weirdly failure was my best friend ( as long as l learnt from it)
So instead of running away from my failures l began to embrace and use them as tools to get to the next level.
So how did l recognize that levels had changed and use my failures to propel me on my journey.
1.Failure Is A Spanner In Your Toolbox
It is important to understand what failure is?
Failure does not have to be a catastrophe.
In most cases failure acts as feedback that you have a faulty strategy. It’s a hint that the stuff that you have been doing might no longer work as you are in a transitional phase or have entered another level.
When people fail to handle transition well, they get into trouble. Most people give up their goals at this stage because they think that there is no way out.
When habits you used to do are creeping in, you need to ask take that as a sign that you need to change strategy.
For a number of years I let the orchard get derelict and all sorts of junk was present. It became a mini dumpsite housing broken bricks, pots, old shoes, not to mention the weeds and briers that grew naturally.
It has been hard fixing the orchard. If I had kept it orderly I would not be getting my hands scratched and cut by thorns, coming across snakes and hurting my toes.
The next level demands that you get the basics right, if you are not going to tumble back into complacency.
Son 2:15 Take us the foxes, the little foxes, that spoil the vines: for our vines have tender grapes.
This demands a mindset shift, without a mindset transformation then you cannot breakaway from disorder.
Change is difficult but it’s possible. If l had not thrown stones at the corner of the orchard because I did not have the energy to do it right, therefore, allowing snakes to find a habitat, and compromising my safety and that of other people around.
2. Failure Is A Compass
I had to be humble enough to accept that there are characteristics and attitudes about myself that have gotten me into the mess I am in.
It does not take someone bewitching us. Most times we hex ourselves by the way we talk and the attitudes. I can confidently say that one of the reasons l have excelled is because l had poor relationship skills.
However, failure has put me on the right direction. Consequently, l examined all my relationships and attempted to understand what they meant inbrelation to my journey.
In other words were the people l was hanging out driving me towards my dream or they were taking me on side roads and cul-de-sacs. And the reverse was relevant, was l helping them reach their goals or l was a hindrance.
The fact that most of these relationships were stagnant highlighted that l was failing at relationship building. We did not challenge each other to excel. When you find yourself in such circumstances, you have to choose to leave the people behind or inspire them (something that with sap your energy because change comes from a personal conviction).
Having friends and family is great comfort , however, therevare some people who are not comfortable with changesbso they will progres be negative when you try to change direction.
I have considered my ways and have engaged in an all-out battle to totally transformation I have realized that standing alone is not such a scary thing.
I have also become discriminating about the people l let into my inner circle.
Building proper relationships takes time. You have to commit to serving someone in as much as theybserve you.
3. Failure Is A Time Piece
I have seen much progress in my life over the last seven months, when I got to the next level I faced another kind of disorder, I found that I did not have enough time to do everything I need to improve. Well I believed that I did not have enough time but the truth is that I had abundant time.
However. I have had to focus on my time management and task allocation, whilst the first level was more about Consistent Action, at the next level on my journey I have to concentrate on the effective and productive use of time in order to maintain the momentum.
This has been a challenge because I am not big on time management but that is the giant I have to overcome in order to be productive.
I had a mentality of wanting to develop six pack abs in under eight weeks but my experiences have made me appreciate that in the shot term I might achieve this but as long as my mind is not geared towards lifestyle then the victory will be short lived.
The transformation process takes time. A poor time strategy will result in lopsided outcomes.
How you manage time activities you need to accomplish depends on the individual.
I tried to find a balance between my spiritual, mental and physical needs.
So Do You Think Failure Is A Friend or For?
For a long time l was paralysed by the fear of failure. For almost a decade l made a terrible mistake of not really trying. People said l will fail and l let their words terrify me further, l begun to see all my shortcomings and inexperience as signs that l was doomed.
This did not rally me. When l hit a wall in my progress l gave up, instead of attempting to hear the message in the failure, l heard the voices of people who called me dump, idiot, coward.
I bent my head in shame.
But thankfully there are other people who are encouragers who provided solid advice about putting my failures into perspective.
I urge you to do the same!
It is up to you!
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